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The following joke was recently featured on Digg.com, but due to its innocence and our recent controversies over our post titles, we thought we would feature it in this week’s Friday Funnies:
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second orders half a beer. The third, a quarter of a beer. The bartender says “You’re all idiots”, and pours two beers.
Source: soup.io
Image by ChrisB in SEA
These mixed drinks are always very popular among the ladies at our house:
2 ounces Vodka, 2 ounces Kahlua, 2 ounces Tonic water
In a rocks glass pour vodka, the Kahlua and then the tonic water. Serve with a straw.
16 ounces Corona (one bottle), 1 ounces Bacardi Limon
Open Corona. Fill the empty space in the neck in the bottle with rum. Plug the bottle with your thumb or the palm of your hand. Turn the bottle upside-down so the rum and beer mix. Return bottle rightside-up. Drink.
16 ounces Lager beer (one bottle), 1.5 ounces Tequila
Drop shooter in glass. Fill with beer
8 ounces Lager (1/2 bottle), 8 ounces sweet or dry Cider
Pour ingredients into a pint glass. Drink. Fall over.
1 ounces spiced rum (e.g., Captain Morgan’s), 20 ounces Mountain Dew (a little more than a can and a half)
Put shot in then add soda.
Absolute Vodka, Southern Comfort, Amaretto, Sloe gin, Triple sec, Orange juice
Pour all the ingredients in mixing glass with ice. Shake and strain into shot glasses.
2 ounces vodka, Mountain Dew, ice
Fill glass with ice add vodka and Mountain Dew.
Tip: 1 shot is about equal to 1 ounce
Remember: When mixing drinks don’t buy the good stuff since it will not make too much of a difference. Save your money for when you are drinking drinks straight up.
Dave Chappelle reemerges from his cave to join with John Mayer and do some experiments on how different races dance to different tunes:
Image credit The Eggplant
The following is a guest post by our friend Max Carter from Tales from Your Favorite RA. We personally love his style of a novel-esc writing so be sure to check his blog out!
My name is Max Carter and I am an RA at a small college in Maine. I am often asked by parents what my role is as an RA. What do you do, they ask me. Well, not much. But sometimes I have to clean up messes, break up fights, and even *gasp* write people up for being naughty. (We are not allowed to spank… yet. But I hear that’s one of Obama’s top priorities for 2009. RA spanking: yes we can!) So, how can you make your RA’s life easier? Here are some ways:
Don’t smoke pot and try to bunk your beds. If you want to bunk your beds, ask your RA and he or she can get the proper materials for you. In fact, don’t smoke pot in the dorms at all, or the pot-sniffing dogs will sniff you out.
If you are not feeling well and are able to get to the bathroom, you should be able to make it to the toilet. Seriously. Vomit is one thing; diarrhea is inexcusable.
Don’t try to pick a fight with anyone within earshot unless you’re really big and strong. Or on PCP. You’re invariably going to get the snot beaten out of you. In fact, don’t try to pick a fight regardless of your size. It just creates a lot of paperwork for your RA and a black eye for you.
Be quiet after quiet hours start. It’s very simple. If quiet hours start at 10pm on your floor, you probably shouldn’t be banging nails into your walls at 3:30am. And when you’ve waken up all of your neighbors and your RA asks you if it’s you making all the noise, don’t deny it. The hammer in your hand gives you away.
Don’t ask your brand new RA if he or she can remind you each morning to take your meds. This is not going to end well for you, your hall mates, or the school. And it puts your RA in an awkward position. And after weeks of not taking said meds, mumbling the phrase “al Queda” while pacing the halls alone is probably going to scare some people.
Keeping your RA is simple. Be respectful of other people and their backgrounds. Colleges – even in Maine – are very diverse. Follow the rules. Clean up after yourself. Break your party up after quiet hours. Seems simple, but a lot of people forget the rules and pay the price. I have two residents right now who are going through AA and doing community service because they got drunk and were too belligerant. Most important rule of all: don’t be stupid.
What is the most vital part of the process of applying for college? Some applicants would say it is passing all exams or making sure that your high-school transcript looks good. Others may state that the most important part is preparing all the needed documents and selecting the institution.
Each of these answers is true. However, there is one more thing that you might be missing out. Let’s discuss scholarships.
With tuition costs going up by leaps and bounds, an awarded scholarship can become a lucky ticket for many high-school graduates. College scholarships and grants can give you a good kick-start into adult life and help cope with a variety of financial issues.
Unfortunately, many young people are ignoring this opportunity, thinking that obtaining a scholarship is extremely hard or even impossible for them.
This judgment is not always true. Of course, it may be hard to find the right opportunity and prepare all the documents. Presenting a top-notch essay isn’t easy as well unless you turn to a professional write my essay online service. However, all it takes is a bit of dedication and work.
Besides, if you know exactly where to search for such opportunities, it is already halfway to success! In this article, we have prepared a list of top five scholarship websites that will help you get the financial help you need. Let’s dive in!
Despite a common belief, finding scholarships can be easy as A, B, C! Just a few decades ago, this process used to be much more complicated and time-consuming. Times have changed, and now, students can do the same quickly and easily.
The easiest way to discover available opportunities is to use specialized websites that have a database of various grants and scholarships. As a rule, applicants can search through a base with the help of multiple filters such as gender, country of origin, academic level, special interests, etc.
How to pick the right website? It could be hard if you’d have to do it on your own, but we’ve got you covered! Below, we have collected some of the best sites to help you fund your education.
Even if you haven’t heard of it yet, trust us, Fastweb is one of those must-have tools for all college applicants! This resource features a convenient tool for finding funding.
Also, here, you can discover tons of internships and jobs. Finally, at Fastweb, students can research different colleges and find up to date information about each institution with ease. Therefore, if you still haven’t used this platform, be sure to give it a try!
Our next top pick is a widely known online resource for university applicants. Here you can find comprehensive information about different types of funding, including grants, financial aid, scholarships, and more.
One of the most significant benefits of FinAid is that it makes finding opportunities simple and helps you determine which ones are the right options!
For those of you who have never heard of it before, the College Board is one of the oldest educational organizations in the world. Thus, it is fair to say that the resources offered by this community are reliable and helpful.
The same applies to their extensive database of funding opportunities called CollegeBoard, where students from all across the globe can discover a variety of options.
This platform’s database contains over 25,000 options, so the chances that everyone will find something suitable are pretty high! The reason why we like this platform a lot is that Chegg Scholarships features an extremely intuitive and convenient searching tool. At the same time, it provides quite accurate matches based on the details you type in.
The last but not least handy option on this list is Peterson’s. It is a smart online platform created to help young people find funding for their education quickly and easily.
The searching tool used at this service has pretty high filtering capabilities, allowing you to find a perfect match based on your needs!
If you are starting off to university, be prepared to face a handful of various challenges daily. In most cases, life in a campus becomes a transition point from a teenager into an adult.
Clearly, this transition can’t pass unnoticed. You can’t avoid some hardships in the studying process. However, one thing you can do right now is to make sure that financial issues won’t be among those issues you may face!
Although obtaining high-quality education is much more available today, it is still expensive. And the cost keeps growing with each year. Applying for grants and scholarships, you can ease the financial burden and get more of your campus years.
Hopefully, this article will help future students find just the right opportunities for them. Using any of the websites mentioned above, you can save plenty of time and discover the most exciting scholarships available out there.
Now, all that’s left to do is to believe in yourself and do your best to get the funding you need!